Unilateral breathing preventing swimmer's shoulder.

Dudes,

I was going to post something on swimmer's shoulder because I've been a little sore lately (see link if you want), but in the vein of humor (holla at ya slim) and since I'm about 3 drinks into it right now, I'm going to post a funny e-mail I sent to some freinds this morning detailing my night last night, and morning. Click the link if you want to read about swimmer's shoulder, but read on if you want to hear what I've been up to the last day or so....

BG

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Sent at 8:55am, Thursday, 10/18/07....

OMG, check out my last 24……actually 21.5 hours…..

So last night, I get a call from Tracy at about 5:10 at my desk (I usually leave between 5 and 5:15), and meet the girls at home. She has blown a tire, and is sitting in the Ridgedale parking lot. I tell her that I will go pick up the kids, and that she should go to Big Bowl, and have a glass of wine, and wait for us. So, not a big deal. It was raining out pretty hard at this point, but it only took me about ½ hour to get the kids, and meet her at Big Bowl. We do dinner, and then I go out to change the tire. I am thinking that this will take me about 20 minutes…….terrible estimate. I decide to change into my workout clothes I have in my bag, because I think that changing a tire in my work clothes is dumb, especially in the rain. It ends up taking me close to an hour to jack this mo fo up, change the tire, and get all the shit back in the car. Visual**** Bryan in a white t-shirs and running tights, and running shoes, laying on the ground in the rain FOR ONE HOUR jacking up the family truckster. Nice. I am surprised, but not entirely, that nobody stopped to even ask if I had everything I needed. More surprised actually, that mall security didn’t come out and give me a ticket for indecency.

So, soaked, I go home. Thankfully, there is a Chrysler dealership 3 blocks from my house, so I go home, kiss the wife and kids, and head out to the dealership to get a new tire. I’m thinking 100-150$ max, right? Terrible estimate. $325 later, I walk out of the dealership with a new P235/6517R. For those that don’t know, the Chrysler Pacifica has 17 inch wheels – translation – hella expensive to replace.

So, go home right – Clara has thrown up in her crib. For the next 4-5 hours, get up virtually every hour because she is either crying or gaging. At one point (about 2:30 in the AM), I wake up in the chair, rocking her, and can’t remember getting up. I must have….but still don’t remember. Must be a reflex. Go back to bed at about 3:00. Wake up at 4:00, because tracy has got up with her, and is calling me from the other room. I walk in, and tracy is holding her legs up in the air, and there is an extraordinary amount of poop all over the changing table. So, I hold clara’s legs up in the air, while tracy cleans all the poop off of her legs / butt / changing table. I think that she will go back to sleep, but all she wants to do is play now. Struggle with her for the next hour and ½, and finally give up at about 5:30 when Tracy gets up.

Normal morning routine – give the kids breakfast, get clothes on, put ponies in Emma’s hair. Feel like a bad dad, because I plunked clara in the exersaucer, and turned on cartoons, while I sat next to her, and finished Emma’s ponies.

Finally, get to loading everyone up. Go outside, and it is pouring like crazy. Get Clara in the car, while Emma watches from the house. Get moderately soaked. Run back to grab Emma, who promptly runs away from me, laughing like crazy. She has taken off her shoes and socks. Mind you, Clara is sitting in an unlocked car in my driveway. Check to make sure that nobody is stealing Clara. Run back outside. Lock the car to make sure. Run back inside and corral my crazy little laugher with again no socks and shoes on. Pick her up finally, and get her into the car. It is pouring harder now, and in the mix, I’ve forgotten to put on my raincoat. Emma gets in her carseat, and won’t let me buckle her in for about 20 seconds, in which time, I get completely soaked. Run back in the house, grab my raincoat (really wondering what the point is now), and get in the car. This is what I hear: “Daddy, I need a cheerios snack!!!!” I try to reason with her, and she starts crying, because normally, I give her a little cereal in the car on the way. I pull out of the driveway, and try to convince myself to ignore the minor tantrum in the back seat because she has already eaten cereal, banana bread, and juice this morning, and is ultimately the reason I’m soaked to the bone. She calms down after about 2 miles.

Get to daycare, don’t tell the infant teachers that Clara threw up the night before, but do tell her that she did not sleep well at all. They tell me “oh, there has been a bug going around – 4 kids have got it – vomiting and diarrhea.” Nice, so I’ve got that to look forward to I guess.

Anyway, finally got the kids dropped off, and got to drink my coffee on the ride in. I’m probably not going to dry out until noon, which in my estimation is just about the time that daycare will call me to go pick up Clara because she is throwing up and pooping all over.

The thing is, you really have to laugh, because you can’t make it up. And I know that in 25 years, I’ll look back on this, and think these were some of the best days of my life. However, at the moment, I’m soaking wet, and tired as hell.

…..A good 21.5 hours…..